Archive for the ‘BritniL’ Category

Has He Forgotten?

Posted: December 2, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

I close my eyes only to be reminded of him.

I open my eyes only to remember he is gone.

I breathe in only I’m choking on the memories.

What has happened?

What have I done to deserve so much pain?

I’m lost, and aware of it.

With out you I have no home.

So I run away, my life is demolishing before my eyes.

Without you I have no reason to live.

So what am I to do?

I hang my head in sorrow, pitiful lies swelling up inside my heart.

I hold my head up pretending to be something that I am not.

Strong.

I am weak, always have been.

So what am I suppose to do?

I close my eyes and jump.

Hitting rock bottom.

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Flames

Posted: December 1, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

I’m dead.

You may laugh at that or roll your eyes, but it is true.

I’m dead.

My every breath comes out in a long choking, gasping, pitiful howl.

A howl of pain and self resort.

Some watch as I walk by them, staring at me in concern.

Pale flesh tight to the bone, blue eyes with blackness underneath, and thin hair mid back.

I am the walking dead, and with fear they search for a place to hide.

No-one knows what I am going through, they only think of me as a sick creature.

I am no creature, but a person.

Why can’t they see?

That in order to live I must live throughout He.

I turned my back on Him, and believed not.

I became what they call possessed, forced to slither on my back, tonuge outstretched, a hiss forming behind my teeth.

I was a non believer, I am a non believer.

How can such a great man force me to live this way?

I don’t know who I am.

I want to believe, but with these bending bones, I can not.

The stars are not stars but fire slowly burning out.

Every wish I have ever made was on an airplane or a satellite.

Our plants died, dad was out of work, mom got cancer, my aunt died.

And yet you expect me to believe.

That a man so great has given me death, and a creature forced to be.

But I look beyond the hate I feel for the man.

I look beyond all the bad I have received, the dead child that was consumed, and I look up at the flowers that has yet to bloom.

A believer?

I’m not.

But to believe?

I do.

Dreamers

Posted: December 1, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

No-one knows who I am, my name is a given.

I don’t even know who I am besides a few words that come to my mind.

I am an author and a teacher.

My words are soon to be famous and I will live throughout the very next book you hold in your hands.

Now can you see, a dreamer I am.

A dreamer I want to be.

One day you may laugh at this, and think of all the thoughts that are now crossing your mind.

You’ll laugh at thinking that I couldn’t succeed.

Because I will succeed.

My words will be a rainbow before your eyes, taking you on a journey you have not yet overcome.

You will become a different person, your body will be transformed into something you have never thought of being.

I am a dreamer, and that is what I want to be.

Right now you are thinking that I am a pitiful child dreaming of something that is never to exist.

But I’m letting you have one out of the three, Right now I am a dreamer.

But mark my words I will overcome everything I said I would.

I will be a teacher, and I am an author in the making.

But I will always be a dreamer, and I always will be.

We Reunite

Posted: December 1, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

I don’t need you in order to breathe, I have my own lungs.

I don’t need you in order for me to go on living, it’s a logical fact.

I don’t need you to make my day any brighter, that’s all up to the sun.

So to come to a conclusion, I don’t need you.

You were never the center of my universe, although I once claimed you were.

How stupid could I have been to include you in everything I had done?

I gave you the power to destroy me, and that is exactly what you did.

I watched as my heart went up in flames and you devoured my soul.

But I am claiming it again.

It’s mine, I’m stealing it back!

I don’t need some selfish critic to wrap me in his arms and whisper lies into my willing ears.

I don’t need you!

So hand over the invisible key and turn away, because what’s gone is gone.

I don’t want you anymore.

The moon is the center of my universe.

It listens to my secrets and keeps them away from everyone else.

It stares down at me with a smile and glow, not wanting anything but my happiness.

I have no wishes that need to be fulfilled anymore.

The moon has taken all my pain away.

So I stand here today, my face turned to you.

My knees want to give out, but I wont le them.

You control me no more.

So hand over the key and let us reunite in sorrow as I walk away.

Lost

Posted: December 1, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

I can see the burning of the stars as they gently fall to the ground,

Leaving a pink dusty feel to the air.

I can hear as the wind welcomes me,

Telling me it is alright for me to go home.

I can taste the chill of the rainĀ  as it slides from my cheek onto my tounge,

Demolishing all the bad.

I can remember each tiny feature about you,

Why can I not forget?

You left me to die,

To gasp for air and feel the pain.

But I conquered the pain, I demolished death, I survived.

You have nothing on me any more,

You do not control me.

I lost you a long time ago,

No, correction, I lost you a long time ago.

But the pain was over,

Is over, I think.

But the nightmares that take place at night,

Warns me that all is not okay,

Something is wrong,

I remember that day.

Could I be lost,

Within that day?

One Time

Posted: December 1, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

Tonight we fall, with broken hearts.

The sound of a heart beat haunting you,

The tick of the clock following you where ever you are to go.

Tonight we fall, with frozen tears.

The feel of pain, reminding you of whomever it was,

Who broke your heart and left you to die.

Tonight we fall, as wounded soldiers,

A broken soul decapitated,

Lost with no self control.

Tonight we fall, in memory of a loved one.

The memories coming back to haunt you,

To devour you,

To make you resent life.

A loved one who left you so broken,

That if death was to come,

You’d open your arms freely,

And wait for the pain to be at ease.

Tonight we fall, in the fire.

The fire that raises to capture all who enters.

The place where all are so frightened to enter,

All because of the burn.

But it doesn’t burn,

Not anything compared to the horrid throbbing pain,

From the knife that was easily jabbed into your chest,

From that loved one trying to strike your heart,

But hitting a vein.

The pain from a broken heart lingers,

But the heat of the fire will take it away.

Tonight we fall, in eternal damnation.

Raining Fear

Posted: November 30, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL, Uncategorized

Tear drops falling all around, no one there to hear the sound

Desperate matters calls for crying,why cant he see that I’m dying?

Lonley nights and broken mornings, shattered hearts and wounded glory.

Hated life, regretted breaths, why cant he see he’s taking each step?

Hearts are shattered where I walk, lips are moving but I cant hear them talk.

Mirrors surround my ground, showing the world I’m falling to pieces with no sound.

I can see time pass me by, like an eagle just realizing he can fly.

Holding onto broken dreams, falling apart within the seams.

Desperate matters calls for crying.

Why cant he see that I’m dying?

Lost like a lion in water, trying to survive and find air.

Praying for the strength to runaway, why is his life fading to grey?

His roar not as strong as before, his paws are weak sinking to the ocean floor.

His heart stopping within each beat,why is it deaths doors he must meet?

Beaten like a child, bruised and withered with those memories.

Like blood, has stained his story’s page.

Trying to find a place she can go.

No one wants her, that’s all she knows.

She tries to hide all her tears, knowing deep inside death haunts her fears.

So she locks herself up, away from the world.

People are only there to hurt her, they keep her terrified.

Like her father keeps her scared.

Helpless like a mother, who never had the chance.

Forced to breathe, while the master makes her dance.