Archive for December, 2010

Thoughts of You.

Posted: December 3, 2010 by cierrabee in CierraB

We sit there in class,

listening to the teacher teach things we’ll never have to know in the outside world.

I don’t even hear her, all I can see or hear, or even think about is you.

You’re on my mind constantly, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I love, love, love you more than words can say.

I love you over the rainbow, past the moon and Pluto, to the Milky Way and back a billion times and more.

When I’m right beside of you, I feel like I’m right where I need to be.

And here you are, beside of me, making me feel like I’m on Cloud 9, like I’m soaring to somewhere unknown.

I can just imagine us in perfect harmony.

And I wonder if you feel the same way.

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Flaws?

Posted: December 3, 2010 by brittany1795 in BrittanyH

There is a girl who’s kidded because she id tiny. This doesn’t bother the girl though. She thinks it makes her unique. But, there are some things that bothers the girl that she hides behind the fake smile that’s plastered on her pale face. The fact that she only has one person she can tell everything to, the fact that her family has lied to her from day 1, the fact that couldn’t do anything right. She talked to her biological dad and suffered through everything that went with it. Her dad coming home angry and upset, hearing him cuss basically for the first time, watching her mom cry, wondering why God had even put her on the earth. Why was it so bad for her to talk to him? Is it because he’s a shadow of her mom’s past? Thoughts of running away crossed her mind but she realized she couldn’t run away from things. She wished she could go away, everyone would be better off. Nobody likes her anyways. So, she built a wall around her heart that no one could tear down, she couldn’t trust anyone anymore. All she heard were lies in her head over and over from people all around her. For once I want someone to tell me the truth about my life, every detail, every aspect.

A night in July.

Posted: December 3, 2010 by melissa2012 in MelissaH

Do you remember that night in July? I do. We were outside in the moist summer air still heavy with the scent of freshly cut grass and the smoke of an old fire. The sky was beautifully decorated with thousands of diamonds. We started chasing fireflies, laughing when we tripped over each other. I remember feeling nervous when we were alone. We shared blue and green ice pops. I remember Tyler saying, “Let’s play truth or dare!” I remember the feeling of your scruffy hair on your face as we kissed. My face throbbed as we slowly drifted away from each other. Then the moment was shattered when my mom told me it was time to come home.

Mirror Mirror

Posted: December 3, 2010 by britnimishelowe in BritniL

Small child with uncovered bruises,

Waiting on the world to see,

Small child with tear filled eyes,

Why do you look like me?

Young woman with shaking hands,

Screaming for help.

Young woman who can barely stand,

Why do you remind me of when I ran away?

Lady with the blue eyes,

Like an ocean, current going wild.

Lady with a wounded heart,

Why do I feel we can’t depart?

Elderly woman with shattered wings,

Bent down to touch his cheek.

Elderly woman with sad goodbyes,

Why do I feel so weak?

Ice cold glass stands in between us two,

Me staring back at you,

Wrinkles of worry sliding down your cheek,

A tear in your eye,

You feel lost and weak.

We touch the glass,

Both at the same time.

…Elderly woman, You are me!

Just A Smile.

Posted: December 3, 2010 by tamikatolliver in TamikaT

I smile to cover my pain, hurt, and my cry.

No one will ever understand me.

I talk to people and they say that understand, but they don’t.

If they understood then they could feel my hurt,

feel my pain and hear my cry.

Feel the hurt that I feel

Feel the pain that I feel

Cry like I cry.

So everyday I walk around like nothings wrong.

I laugh, and I giggle .

But I smile to cover my pain, hurt, and cry.

Bitter sweet memories..

Posted: December 3, 2010 by melissa2012 in MelissaH

You lay underneath the cold, dark earth.

Rotting in your own little box.

You’ve been there for two years now.

Sometimes it’s hard for me to think about how the body that I used to hug and the person that I used to look at is now turning deep shades of purple and green and slowly falling apart.

I wish that I could look in your eyes, but I know that they are probably wasting away and gone. No more a beautiful ocean blue.

I want to call you, but I know that you won’t be there to answer me.

I want to feel you near me. Your spirit. Anything.

I remember when you used to come visit me. I would feel your spirit around me and it made my heart warm and fuzzy.

When I go to your grave I get a knot in my throat and I began to choke on it silently.

I always tried to keep the tears inside as I watched your grave get smaller and smaller as I drove away from it.

I remember the night that you left me. It was two in the morning.

I came home and I remember my sister telling me that you died.

I felt tears falling from my face and onto my hand.

The knot is forming again.

I remember your wake. You didn’t look much different. Except for the fact that you were white instead of a healthy pinkish color.

That night when I went home, I dreaded to get up the next day and go to your funeral.

When the time finally came I was ready and strong. So I thought.

I remember the sad song that they played. I stared at the floor the entire time. I was afraid that if I moved I would burst into tears.

I thought to myself that if they played one more song I wouldn’t be able to make it.

My sister said something to me at the wake that helped me get through it. She said that that wasn’t really you. It was just the shell of your body that your beautiful soul occupied.

I looked around the room to see everyone crying. I was the only one who wasn’t.

When it was our turn to say goodbye to you, I realized that that was the last time that I would ever see you. To see your sweet  face.

The last part of the funeral was when some people lowered your body deep into the ground. I can’t remember who it was.

Now I sit here alive and well while you are hopefully in Heaven having fun with papaw.

And again the knot is forming..

Some things are just about impossible to swallow.

Snow.

Posted: December 3, 2010 by brittany1795 in BrittanyH

Snow, falling delicately on the ground, reminds me of  all the memories we made. It reminds me of all the love I once had for you, when you actually seemed to love back. But, with snow comes snowstorms, which me remind me of the fighting- the yelling, leaving, and heartbreak. It reminds me of how you don’t even care how much of me you destroy, how much hurt is in me, how I cry myself to sleep every night because I feel unwanted. Tired of the hurt that you left me with, I yearn for someone to come into my life that will make me feel like a person, the one who makes my smile real, the one that will love me for me. I want to be whole again- not a mirror shattered by your hammer of what you call “love.” I’m sitting in the darkness, just waiting for someone to put the pieces of my heart back together.